𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗨𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗻 It’s such a blessing and a curse. The hard truth is when I look at a picture of my children, I instantly see the one that is missing. It is my broken heart that sometimes has the 20/20 vision, while my regular eyesight takes a backseat. I see the unseen. I see the empty spaceContinue reading “Seeing The Unseen”
Tag Archives: grieving
➑ 𝗠𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗛𝗦!
⫸ 𝕋𝕠𝕡 𝕋𝕖𝕟 𝕋𝕚𝕕𝕓𝕚𝕥𝕤 ⫷ ➙ 17 pounds 5 ounces ➙ 27.5 inches long ➙ only sits still for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse ➙ rather nibble on own feet vs. dinner ➙ “Mr. Crazy Squawky Pants” ➙ hits fists on mouth to make funny sounds ➙ huge fan of peanut butter ➙ loves when Mama sings ‘Open-Shut Them’ ➙ highly offended if binky is offered ➙ obsessed with banana puffsContinue reading “➑ 𝗠𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗛𝗦!”
‘223 Reminiscent Days’ with “my boy(s)”…
Today, you outlive your brother. Which means: 223 days of loving you… 223 days of studying your eyes; I fixate on the faint gold ring around your dark pupil and how it dissolves into a large mass of deep crystal blue. 223 days of kissing your head; I lean in with pursed lips, simultaneously inhalingContinue reading “‘223 Reminiscent Days’ with “my boy(s)”…”
6 MONTHS GONE
Hi Theodore,Momma here…Today, marks 6 months.Half a year since I’ve looked into those fierce eyes.I have nothing profound to say,besides “I love you more than life itself”. Thank you for filling my arms for 223 days.It’s your strength that has quite literally become mine.Just one thought of your courage empowers me to do absolutely anything.And itContinue reading “6 MONTHS GONE”
ALIVE IN THE SHADOWS
Happy 1st Birthday, my sweet Theodore. Mommy wanted to do something extra special to honor your beautiful soul; an eternal soul that is still very much alive. From the day you were born, it was always your soul that touched me more than your body. Even on your birthday, they whisked you away for the first openContinue reading “ALIVE IN THE SHADOWS”
WE LOCKED EYES
The church doors opened, and all I saw was you. Not the friends and family gleaming on either side of the aisle, or even the photographer following us with flashing lights could distract me from your eyes. I felt my Dad’s strong grip around my arm, but it was your misty eyes that remained myContinue reading “WE LOCKED EYES”
CHEEK TO CHEEK
That is how it should still be… your pudgy little cheek pressed up against mine; your wispy blonde hairs tickling my temple as I press in closer and closer to you. Some mornings when it’s extra hard to catch my breath, I even find myself taking the back of my hand and pressing it upContinue reading “CHEEK TO CHEEK”
DADDY’S ARMS
Little did I know that this would be your last picture with Theodore. And the more I stare at it, the more I realize how this final moment with your son perfectly summarized your entire relationship. Theodore always felt safe in his daddy’s arms. And you, Michael Nelson, are the pillar of strength for ourContinue reading “DADDY’S ARMS”
•• REALITY ••
MK insisted on taking her little brother for a drive today. Never in my wildest dreams did I think ‘playtime’ would look like this… but ‘this’ is our reality. And that’s the thing about ‘reality’ – you can’t hide from it. You can either run from reality, or choose to accept it. Although, trying toContinue reading “•• REALITY ••”
TURNING PAIN INTO PURPOSE 👇
It has been one month since I’ve held my beautiful baby boy… and within those painful 30 days, besides feeling every single emotion known to man, coupled with periods of complete numbness, I’ve realized this: it’s not about “learning to get over it”, it’s about “learning to live through it”… and for me, that includesContinue reading “TURNING PAIN INTO PURPOSE 👇”
FALLING RIGHT SIDE UP 